laurenrocks's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- i alone love you. this weekend.... hmmm... brian sprained his ankle on thursday so friday morning i took him to the health center, and then his mother picked us up and we got his ankle x-rayed. he has to use crutches. GIMP. this weekend was kinda ruined because of his spill down the stairs, but that's neither here nor there. we spent a lot of time at his mother's house since she basically kidnapped him and made him stay at her house all weekend. I was there too, but not against my will. saturday night brian and i went to dinner and we saw "rundown." it's a good action movie, for what it is, afterall. the rock.. eh. he looked black in the movie. is he part black? brian and i got into it about his ex-girlfriend again last night. i finally told him exactly how i felt about things and about her. i told him that i thought she was acting clingy and needy recently because she knows that brian is in love with someone else and that she is even further away from being with him than she was before. she is hopeful that they will be together someday soon, and i really don't think she has any clue. it isn't her fault entirely. she's fucked up thanks to years of abuse, but she isn't really doing anything about it now. she isn't going to therapy or al-anon or something that would definitely make a difference in her life. she is looking to brian to make her happy and whole and she isn't going to get that from him. but i told brian this: i don't compete for love. i love you but if i have to fight ashalee in order to keep you, i won't do it. i love you, but no one is worth that to me. i deserve 110% of you, no less. i don't share because i shouldn't have to. you are not the only guy on the planet who can make me happy. what you decide to do is up to you, but this is where i stand. like it or love it. i honestly believe that he is going to talk to her and tell her to back off. i trust that he will because he said he would. and lying to me is fine and dandy until i find out. and then i eat you alive. break my heart and i'll make sure you live to regret it. 5:47 p.m. - 09.28.03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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